i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
As shirtless as possible
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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