Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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