you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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