sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
