we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
