This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
