I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Rumble strips road head = magical
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
