I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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