Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize