Can Purell be used as lube?
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
