i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
