PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
only if we run a train.
done.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
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