It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
