I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
