there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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