If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize