I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize