Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
