i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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