mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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