whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
