Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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