yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
