D3 body, D1 cock
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
