Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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