Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
