she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize