11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I wish I could punch you in the face.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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