so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize