I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
