Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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