forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
