Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
