Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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