I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
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she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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