i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
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