As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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