So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
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was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
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Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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