i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
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