I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize