the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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