we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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