k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize