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• (702): View more from Nevada

  The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before

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• (516): View more from New York

  Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.

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• 

  These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (813): View more from Florida

  just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.

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• (310): View more from California

  I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.

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• 

  21 Reasons You’ll Be Forever Alone

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (954): View more from Florida

  Promise me you won't have sex in my room

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.

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• (805): View more from California

  I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans

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• (250): View more from British Columbia

  My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...

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• (856): View more from New Jersey

  DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS

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