I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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