Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
