you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
