Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
