Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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