I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
